On April 09,1994, My olds calais was broadsided by an F150 truck. I remember some peculiar things about the accident, like a white haired lady reasurring me that I would be ok, and telling me that my back wasn't broken.I woke up in the hospital a few days later, at St Mary Hospital in Pueblo Colorado.

The first thing that caught my attention was the ammount of pain I was in. I had a grumpy nurse that didn;'t like her job much that kept jabbing me in the thigh with demerol needle. It didn't touch the pain. Only maid me feel worse. I could not understand language. It sounded like jibberish. I didn't know who my 11 yr. old daughter was, and confused my boss as being my mother and my mother as being my boss. My big brother stayed in the room with me over nite. I guess I was so mean and out of character that no one else could deal with me. I thought that john was the reason I was in so much pain, maybe cause he was there when that bad mean nurse would jab me with that blam needle.I focused on the the pain and thought that my brain was only messed up by the demerol.It turned out that my pelvis was crushed, my l4 cracked, and I had a slight hemmorage in the right temporal lobe with brain shear. Three days after the accident they sent me home. I was on crutches caus I could not sit, I couldn't feel my legs but I could lock my knee joint in the right leg. most of the broken pelvic bones were on the left, exccept the right si joint. It was painful to be weightbearing, even on just the rightside.It wasn't until I got home that reality hit. My husband who is a railroad engineer, had to take 10 days off to care for me. I lived in hellacious pain and confusion.I prayed for god to take me...but everyday things got better. Even if the improvement was slight, it did get better.About three weeks after the accident I wanted a real shower, so My husband helped me by suspending me under my armpits. It was humiliating that i couldn't do it my self.I insisted on dressing myself and that is when I discovered I couldn't put shirts on up side down...and a bra? forget about it.I was terrified that someone would find out how bad I was really hit in the head, and loose my job, my friends, maybe even be socked away in a hospital.I was terrified.I taught myself language again by making and using over 600 flash cards of common speach, so that I could improve my processing speed. When I felt comfortable speaking again I went back to work and guess what? I got fired.My processing wasn't good enough to go back.So ....Knowing I wasn't stupid but just set back, I put myself through real Estate school. I put everything on index cards and wore them out.It took a few times, but I passed my brokers test, Got my GRI designation, while working in my own capacity as an independent agent.I lost alot of money for three years because of the cognitive deficits that I could not compensate for. Finally I hired an attorney to initially pay the medical bills, but who also helped me recieve better medical treatment and compensation to replace part of the income that I use to bring home.

I still live in pain, and I'm still slow on processing, and I still have ptsd difficulties and i am still limited physically and mentally, but I have grown leaps and bounds spiritually, and I feel as a person I have grown because it took something like this to make me appreciate the small things in life. It is the small things in life that I give back to others now. Kids always recognize and appreciate the small things. Consequently, Kids love me. Adults tolerate me. But what the heck.THis is who I am now...and There was no record of the white haired woman at the scene. Guardian Angel? My back was broken, but would I have taught myself how to walk so soon had I known?

God does work in mysterious ways. Thanks for reading my first book.
Cynthia Parker

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