That is not to say that I didn't seek help off and on over the years, but because the brain injury went undiagnosed at the time, I was labeled a hypochondriac, or drug addict in search of drugs, etc. The doctors kept telling me they could find nothing wrong with me, because I was unable to communicate to them about the collision. I could not remember any details, even the date. I barely finished High School, only just graduating because my grades had gone from A's & B's to D's & F's, and still no one paid attention.

My mother had witnessed her mother killed by a drunk driver, and lost a husband to a drunk driver, and refused to recognize that her daughter, who physically survived, was any other way than what she remembered. She never registered the fact that I had memory problems, or that I quit participating in any extra-curricular activities and could barely get any work done. She refused any recompense for my injuries because she "didn't believe in suing people." I still haven't figured out why my step father did nothing.

As I grew older, married, had children, my family would periodically comment on statements I would make by calling me "simple" My stepfather and I had serious emotion filled arguments, and still do. I have had to allow my children to go live with their father, as I simply can not handle the stress of being a single mother with three children to raise. This is probably the biggest negative effect of my injury.

I become extremely emotional at the slightest provocation, which will eventually lead to nightmarish anger attacks, tears and the blinding headaches. I have been unable to maintain a job because I have problems interacting with other people. I don't qualify for disability because I have been unable to maintain a job, and because my marriage was 5 months from being a full 10 years. I had to search the lawbooks at the library to find a law allowing me medical coverage by the State. Otherwise, I receive no monetary income. I don't even qualify for welfare because of technical reasons.

I have withdrawn from society, living on a small farm with a vietnam vet, who has problems of his own. I attend counseling sessions on a regular basis, which has probably been the best thing. I do, however find it extremely difficult to participate in outside activities, anything requiring me to learn new skills is extremely difficult and scary to the point of phobia.

Please people, don't drive under the influence, and if a loved one is involved in any accident where ther is the possibility of a head injury, pay attention. Often times when bad things happen, people don't know what to do, or will go into a state of denial. Because my family ignored the symptons, I spent years suffering, thinking I was going crazy. The night terrors and emotional upheaval prevented me from accomplishing much in my life. Please, be understanding of your loved ones if they become a victim of this little acknowledged problem and see that they receive the help they need, because even they will often not recognize or admit to being any different that they were before. My love and strength to all of you out there.

Daphne