A FATHER'S STORY 
 
   When the phone rang at 5:45am on Fri. Aug.27th 2004 I knew before I answered it
that it was not going to be good news. 
 
  The voice on the other end was an ER nurse from Plano Medical Center in Plano, TX.
She asked if I was the father of Brett Bostick, my heart sank, I can remember
saying O MY God, before I answered yes, she said there had been an accident and he
was in the emergency room. I'm not sure what I said next. She told me that the he
had tried to commit suicide by hanging himself, I went to the floor, this can't be
real, I asked her if he was ok, still alive, going to die, the thoughts in my
head. I then spoke to the ER Doctor he said that Brett had been without oxygen for
approx. 20-30 mins. and that he was on life support. For some reason I remember
him saying that he had brain activity but as you will soon read maybe he didn't.
It took me an hour to drive to the hospital, the longest hour of my life. 
 
  I had seen Brett less than 24 hrs ago, by the way Brett is 21yrs old, he had
called and asked if he could borrow(have) some money for gas, I m a sucker head,
just ask my 4yr old daughter, We were in a hurry to pickup the other kids from
daycare and school and met him for a short time, didn't spend alot of time
talking, he was on his way home to Plano from surprising his brother in Ks. for
his 17th birthday, what a caring brother Brett is.  
 
  When I got to the hospital there was my oldest son, my baby, part of my body and
soul, one of my hero's, laying motionless with tubes and IV's everywhere I held
his hand and started praying. A few of his friends were there and told me that
Brett had been drinking and got into a fight with a girl that he had just recently
started dating, she was leaving and he told her if she left he would kill himself,
ah the wonderful things alcohol does to our minds and body and judgment. He had
locked her out of his 2nd story apartment, tied a flag around his neck and lowered
himself from the balcony, when he realized this was not a smart thing to do, the
girlfriend said he tried to pull himself back up and lost his grip, it took 20-30
minutes before the police and paramedics got there kicked down his door and got
him down. No pulse, No heartbeat I was told. He was intubated and received a round
of epinephrine and this restored his heartbeat. 
 
  At approx. 10:00am they moved him to CCU, I started making what seemed like a
thousand phone calls, and the tears, the heartache. We were only allowed to see
Brett for 30 minutes every two hours, I never realized how long an hour and half
is, Around 3:00 pm the Trauma Physician came in the waiting room to give us an
update, whew, finally. He told us that Brett was considered Brain Dead, went to
the floor again, o my god, the only thing that was keeping him alive were the
machines and we needed to start preparing ourselves to make a decision to have
life support turned off if no improvement over the next 48 hours, or a miracle. He
told us that probably the worst thing that happened was the paramedics bringing
him back to life, God bless the paramedics, that if he did live he would spend the
rest of his life in a nursing home in a vegetative state. My world, our world,
turned upside down. I probably won't say this enough but God is a loving God,
either good or bad, he is a loving God.                                           
  
  
Aug. 28th 2004 
 
 Brett opened his eyes while me, my wife and my parents were in his room, the
excitement in the room was incredible, we told the nurse, soon after that the
patient rep. took us into a room and told us that opening his eyes was a reflex,
not voluntary, and not to keep our hopes up. Balloon busted. I'm not sure what it
was, a leg or arm movement, excitement again, again told not a voluntary movement,
balloon busted again. 
I got a hold of Terry and Leslie Ezell, I had lived with them my last semester of my
senior year in high school, our children were playmates when they were small.  Terry
was out but I spoke to Les and told her what had happened and I needed to get a hold
of Tony Palmer who I spent alot of time with in my late teens and early twenties,
his son T.J. and Brett are the same age and spent some time together as infants. 
She said she would take care of it and she did, Terry and Les I love you both very
dearly. 
I decided to go to Brett's apartment, when I pulled up my phone rang, it was Tony,
who is now a pastor, man this is the one person I've been needing to talk too, we
spoke for almost an hour until my battery went down on my phone. Tony prayed a lot
and I listened. God puts people in our lives at the right time and he did it then.
Tony told me that I also needed to call our old friend Eric Adams, I called Eric and
we spoke for awhile, but the only thing I can remember Eric saying was LET GO AND
LET GOD. 
I then made the decision if God wants my son, God's going to have to take him,
because it's not going to be my decision if he lives or dies. 
 
Aug. 30th 2004 
 
   They ran an EEG and found positive brain patterns, not what they were expecting,
guess what, I'm not going to let them bust my balloon again. It's in Gods hands. 

 
  Brett spent 2 weeks in CCU and another 2 weeks in an isolation room due to
infections from his Trach and Catherder. He seems to know when we're there, and at
times smiles, but he has this ugly face and I mean ugly. My scariest moment so far
was in CCU when he made this face and then bit down on his tongue, blood
everywhere, I was trying to open his mouth and yelling for help, I will never
forget that moment.  
 
 
 Sept. 24th 2004 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRETT                             
 
  We brought cake and balloons, had a party. I could tell in Brett s eyes he knew
what it was. At the end of the party I offered the remaining cake to the nurse,
she declined and said we might want to throw it away that Brett has an infection
and we probably shouldn't have eaten the cake, WAIT! SHE SAW ME BRING IT IN. Now
instead of driving the hour home in a wonderful mood, I'm now terrified of what
infections my other children are going to get. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SON, I LOVE YOU, NO
MATTER WHAT. 
 
Sept. 25th 2004 
 
  They tell us that they've done all they can do and they are going to move him to
the nursing home we've found that will take him, did I mention he doesn't have
insurance. He was still running fever and what about the infection that has kept
him in isolation, the nursing home doesn't have an isolation room. Hmmm what if he
had insurance???? 
 
 Sept 27th 2004 
 
  Brett s new home, Denison Manor, Denison, TX. 15 minutes from the house, Thank you
God, the staff was so excited about Brett coming, he is young, strong, and he has
a huge heart. Still a parents fear, can they take care of him and get him and give
him what he needs physically and mentally. They have a Physical and Occupational
Therapist on staff and they too are excited about having Brett. I think he is
going to be ok. 
 
  Sept.28th 2004 
 
  The assist. Nursing director Deann called, oh no I thought, she told me that Brett
had just given the nursing director a high five, I'm on cloud 9. We never received
a call from any of the Dr's. or staff while he was in the hospital and had to beg
for information, don't get me wrong there were alot of great and I mean great
caring and helpful nurses at the hospital from the ER staff, CCU staff, and Floor
staff. But he had been at the nursing/rehab center less than 24hrs. 
 
Oct. 1st 2004 
  I noticed that Brett seemed to be running fever, they gave him Tylenol and that
seemed to take care of it, that afternoon he seemed to be fine but then again Sat.
morning he was burning up, later that afternoon trip to ER, temp 105. He stayed in
the hospital until Fri. Oct. 8th, wished they would have kept him a couple more
days, hmmmm insurance? By the way we have applied for Medicaid, as of 10-22-04,
nothing. Got him back to the nursing home they ordered him a feeding pump that not
only feeds him but also administers water, the hospital said he was dehydrated and
they used the dual pump, Deann was great about getting the dual pump. 
 
  I see small progress and regress everyday, what he will do yesterday he doesn't do
today, and what he wouldn't due yesterday he does today. But that's ok. One night
during his stay at the hospital I asked him to wiggle his fingers, he did, I then
said hold up 1 finger, he did, WOW, now lets count, first he counted to 5, then he
would hold up the number of fingers on one hand that I asked him, suddenly with
both hands he started running his fingers from 1 to 5 over and over, remember that
cloud 9 I was on before, back on it, called the nurse in to have a witness, and he
did it for her also. Jennifer came into his room and I told her you've got to see
this, and he started c
ounting for her, the tears just started pouring from her beautiful eyes, it was a
moment I'll never forget.  The hard part is he hasn't done it since.  
 
   I'm proud of my son, who by the way enlisted in the army one month AFTER the
attack on Sept. 11th, when he first told me I was scared, but a few seconds later
I became the proudest father alive.  
 
Oct. 22nd 2004 
 
  I see my son 3 times a day, before work, at lunch, and after work. Yesterday at
lunch they had him sitting in a wheelchair when I walked in, there he was sitting,
resting his head on the headrest looking around, how proud I am, oh yea he had his
first bath last night for the first time in two months, he loved it, he doesn't
speak, his right leg is toning very bad, but he does respond to commands at times,
it may take awhile but he tries, that ugly face he still has, I believe, it is his
way of telling me, Dad I'm trying just wait. PATIENCE, PATIENCE, PATIENCE 
 
Dec. 13th 2004 
 
  After two more trips to the hospital for infections and pneumonia. I'm starting to
lose faith in alot of things, but mainly our Social Security System. I called last
week 
to check on his application, I was told there was no application on file, after
leaving several messages for the caseworker to call me; I left messages with whom I
thought 
was the office supervisor, apparently not, because she hasn't returned my call
either? My copy of the application is dated, Sept. 27th 2004. Also contacted
Medicaid and they said there was nothing they could do until SSI was approved. 
 
 Three weeks ago Brett could move his hands and even count for me at times, suddenly
his spasticity has increased ten fold, I have to force his hands and fingers open
so I can put a ball in his hands, I also purchased some wrist braces.  We talked to
one of the assist. Nursing directors and inquired about his physical rehab that we
thought he was receiving, she informed my wife that was a special circumstance and
that they are no longer giving him any kind of physical or occupational therapy. A
person who had never seen my son made that decision.  
 
  
 
Dec. 14th 2004 
 
  Brett s Grandmother Mary Ellen who lives in Ks. sent an email to Senator Craig
Estes he forwarded it to Robin McCoy who handles constituent case work in Grayson
county, I spoke with Robin and informed her of what was and wasn't happening in
Brett s case, she said that she would inquiry about the Medicaid but the SSI would
have to be handled by Congressman Ralph Halls' office. That afternoon Alex
Gonzalez from the State Capitol in Austin called and said he was informed by Robin
of our situation. 
The next day the local Medicaid office set an appointment for me to complete
applications for Medicaid. Thank you Robin and Alex for your concern and quick
action. 
 
Dec. 15th 2004 
 
  Today I spoke to Judy Rowton with Congressman Halls office, she sent me a Request
for Congressional Inquiry form for his SSI. Early on Dec. 16th the supervisor in
our local office called and apologized about the problem we are having she said
she told the person handling our claim to get it processed immediately, guess it
was collecting dust on his desk, she told me to get a letter from Brett s' Dr.
describing his condition and long term prognosis. Thank you Judy who has called me
to make sure SSI called, you have been one of the miracles I talk about. If we are
having this kind of run around, imagine all the people in our great country who
are probably going through the same thing. It shouldn't have to be this difficult.
I do know that none of my children will ever be without health insurance. 
 
 
Dec. 20th 2004 
 
  Back to the hospital trip #4 since he's been in the nursing home, I gave the
hospital an order for DNR, again, this was something that I have thought about for
days, his condition is not getting any better. I know in my heart that was the
right decision, he has to be in so much pain and it's painful for me to see him
that way. I'm not giving up on him. I am putting him in Gods hands. Miracles do
happen and if the miracle is that God wants him more than he wants me to have him
I'm ok with that.  
  
 
  I'm going to vent a little frustration now about the nursing home, I don't know if
every nursing home is like this or maybe we just got unlucky. Brett was always so
concerned about his hygiene especially his teeth, while they were cleaning his
teeth last Thursday he bit on the tooth brush and pushed out one of his front
teeth, they were loose anyways, but that could have been from them not cleaning
his teeth and mouth daily. About ten days ago he was in the whirlpool, he loves
it, I looked in his mouth and you could have poured water in his mouth and it
wouldn't have gone down his throat because of all the growth that was in his
mouth, if that is proper care at a nursing home then we have a huge problem with
the nursing home system all together. In the middle of my story I said how the
nursing home staff was so excited about having him and being able to work with
him, that excitement is now gone, it feels like now he is a burden to the majority
of the ones that have to work with him or deal with him daily. 
I made a sign and put it in a frame below a picture of him before the accident, it
reads 
 
I am a grandson, a son, and a brother. 
please treat me and take care of me 
like I was your grandson, son, or brother. 
Thank you and God Bless You 
Brett 
 
P.S. 
I don't like being suctioned anymore than 
you like suctioning me but it sure helps me 
breathe better. 
Also could you please help me keep my mouth? 
and teeth clean 
 
 
Dec. 23rd 2004 
 
  Debbie, a social worker from TMC, called and asked if I had thought about hospice
for Brett, my first instinct was I'm not giving up on my son, she explained part
of hospice but it still wasn't what I thought was needed for him, she also said
that Dr. Garvin had also suggested hospice. She left me a pamphlet in his room,
when I first started reading it the emotions started running, then I decided it's
time to do what's right for Brett, but I still wasn't sure if this was it.
Probably the hardest part was that they were going to send him back to the nursing
home the afternoon of Christmas Eve, I was hoping they would have kept him at the
hospital through the weekend but it turned out ok. 
 
Dec. 24th 2004 
 
 We took all the kids to see Brett this morning, we are heading out for Okla. for
the holidays, this is the first time the kids have seen him since he lost his
tooth, it was the hardest for Mikey too see him, but I'm glad he did. We had a
pretty good Christmas, spent time with Jennifer s parents in Tulsa on Christmas
Eve, and the spent Christmas with my parents on Christmas Day for the first time in
years, they have been traveling the country for years and some of the best times
Brett has had were spending time with them on the bus going everywhere. 
 
Dec. 26th 2004 
 
  Got back to the house from the holidays and went and to see Brett, he seemed to be
doing ok, spent some time with him and opened some presents he got for Christmas,
a fleece blanket that Jeff and Carmen got him and some T-shirts and Boxers that
Grandma and Grandpa got him. We put the T-shirt on him and he actually raised
forward on his own to get the shirt on, he's always in a gown or nothing at all. 
 
Dec. 28th 2004 
 
  Spoke with Donna Pack from Home Hospice of Grayson County today, she was very
concerned and sympathetic with my uncertainty and answered my questions honestly,
I really don't remember much of the conversation but had told her about his
condition and what had originally happened. She told me she would have a nurse
stop by and check on Brett to see if they would be able to help him. I don't know
what it was, maybe the way she spoke or the sound of her voice, but I felt a
little better. 
 
Dec. 30th 2004 
 
   I got a message to call Dani Baze with Home Hospice of Grayson County, I called
her back and she told me that she had visited Brett and that they would like to
talk to us about what hospice can and will do to make sure Brett is comfortable.
She told me that they would be there till 4:30pm and then be closed until Monday
for the New Years holiday. I told Jennifer about the conversation and we decided
to go ahead and talk with her before the long weekend. When we arrived Dani
greeted us with a smile and said she would like us to discuss what Hospice is
with her and two other co-workers, I was extremely nervous, as was Jennifer, we
sat at a large table and Dani introduced us to Donna Pack, whom I had spoken to
briefly on the phone and Donna Johnson who is the Social Work Supervisor. We
talked about everything, Brett s condition, our other children; they seemed to
want to know everything they could about our family and our pain. At the end of
the meeting they asked if we wanted to go ahead and have them take care of Brett,
the moment I said yes, my new 3 angels let out a sigh of relief, at the exact
same time. They told us that they had been sitting on pins and needles hoping
that they would have a chance to not only take care of Brett, but to be there for
our family. They had given us a couple of books to read, about what to expect not
only for Brett, but for things we will have to deal with as a family. I want to
let you know I'm not giving up on my son but it is time for him to be as
comfortable as possible. I will be second-guessing myself the rest of my life. It
will be next week before they will be able to start because Brett's Dr. is out of
town. 
 
 
Jan. 4th 2005 
 
   That evening Jennifer and I went to the nursing home to spend some time with
Brett.  Jennifer kissed Brett s head and immediately went for the thermometer,
103.7. I felt his neck and asked the nurse for the heart/oxygen meter I said it
has to be at least 180 bpm. 183 bpm and oxygen level at 88% the nurse called for
an ambulance to transport back to the hospital, trip #5. Dani from Home Hospice
called earlier today and said she was trying to track down Dr. Garvin to get his
signature on all the forms they need, but hadn't had any luck finding him. 
 
Jan. 5th 2005 
 
  They had already moved Brett to a regular room when I got there at 8:00am.  About
2:30pm Bonnie a social worker at the hospital called and said they were
discharging Brett and that she understood that we're putting Brett in Hospices'
care, I told her yes and she said that the hospital has done all they can do for
Brett and that since he is in Hospice care that there wouldn't be another hospital
stay. Damn balloons. I got to the hospital before they transported him back to the
nursing home, I told him that if him and God were holding a miracle that it was
time to produce it because this was going to be his last trip to the hospital. I
stayed with Brett the rest of the day wondering if I was making the right decision
with Hospice, but I know he isn't getting better and I can tell he is in so much
pain. It's not time to give up but maybe it's time to let go. 
 
Jan. 6th 2005 
 
   I went to see Brett this morning for a little while before I met with Dani Baze
to sign all the paperwork for Hospice, he seemed to be a little more restful. I
met with Dani and let her know my feelings of making the right decision; she told
me that anytime I could revoke the Hospice care for any reason. I went back and
spent the rest of the morning and early afternoon with Brett. Dani came by to
complete all the paperwork with the nursing home and looked in on Brett, she said
that she ordered him an air bed, the one he has been on the last 10 days was
borrowed from a resident who had passed away a couple weeks earlier, it was kind
of stolen, but his pressure sores were so bad. I left for an hour and a half and
when I got back I couldn't believe it, not only new airbed, but new oxygen
machine and suction machine. I'm feeling better about my decision. 
I spoke with my father and he assured me that I was making the right decision, no
matter how hard; it was the right thing to do. I also called Brett's Grandmother in
Ks. and she too assured me that I'd made the right decision. Maybe that's what I
needed because I sure started to feel better; my stomach had been in knots all day.
Brett had alot of friends stop by today, I called Candi last night and told her what
was going on, guess she also made some phone calls, I was so glad to see these guys
again and to give them hugs and thanks. 
 
Jan.20th 2005 
 
  Well everything has been pretty good the last 2 weeks, knock on wood, Brett has
pretty much stabilized I figured that after the last hospital stay that it
wouldn't take to long for him to start running a temperature and get infections
back, but so far so good. His pressure sores aren't getting any better but they
aren't getting worse either. I believe that the care he's been receiving since
Hospice has taken over is the best so far. The nursing home staff has really been
good with him also, the current RN staff during the week all three shifts are the
best RN's Brett has had, and they truly care for him. One of his nurses came back
from Mexico Tuesday and brought him a blue sombrero.  
 
Feb. 8th 2005 
 
  I would like to be able to say that everything is getting better but something is
beginning to happen and I'm starting to get worried that the end is near, I will
never give up, but I feel that maybe God is preparing Brett for his journey to
heaven. Brett pulled his G-tube out Friday morning; at first I thought how could
he do this. Sat. Feb. 5th 10:15pm the nursing home called and informed me that the
tube had come out again, no way, sent him back to the ER to have reattached, by
the way he had a wonderful visit today with Papa and Juda, Jennifer s Dad and his
wife, Brett really seemed to recognize and respond to them, it was very special,
back to the G-tube, I called the on call nurse for hospice she returned my call
quickly I asked her if she had any experience in this, the only experience she had
was with a patient that was mobil and could move, she called the ER for me and
they told her that possibly they hadn't blown up the end of the tube enough.
12:30am Sun. 6th the nursing home called to let me know Brett was back and he had
given the on duty nurse a smile. Mon. the 7th I went to see Brett after work and
after giving him a kiss I lifted the sheets, I couldn't believe it the tube was
out again, the thoughts going through my mind, was this Brett s way of telling me
that he had enough, we figured out he was using his left elbow to push the tube
out. Decision time again, I've had so many of these the last 5 months, after
talking to Billie and Deann I decided to send him back to the ER one more time,
this time they put in the next larger tube. I saw Brett this morning before work,
after giving him a kiss, whew, tube still in. I pray everyday for a miracle and I
ask Brett everyday if he's said his prayers. What ever happens it will not be by
my will, but by Gods. 
 
March. 23rd 2005 
 
  It's been awhile since I ve made an entry so that must be a good thing, Brett
hasn't had any trouble with the new feeding tube, he has had a bout with his
catherder and 
his urine became real dark a couple of weeks ago, but it cleared up pretty quick.
The last few days I can't help but to feel for Terri Schiavo's parents, I can't
imagine what they must be going through today watching their daughter being starved
to death. I would like to share a letter to the editor of our local newspaper. 
 
Letter to the Editor HERALD DEMOCRAT Sherman, TX. Published March 27th Easter Sunday 
 
My wife told me, when a judge in Florida ordered the feeding tube removed from Terri
Schiavo, some of her co-workers were joyous and thought it was about time. We live
in the greatest country in the world with the freedom of speech and our own opinion.

 
My family lives daily with a 22-year-old son who is in a so-called vegetative state,
living in a local nursing home, under the care of Hospice, with a feeding tube and a
trach to receive oxygen. On Easter Sunday, it will be 7 months to the day.  
Until you live in a situation, I don't think you have the right to comment on an
issue like this. To a person who might walk into my son's room, you would believe he
is in a vegetative state - until you see him smile, wink or pucker his lips for a
kiss; only a parent knows. 
 
We have lost the big picture, God. I'm not a religious person, but I do believe in
God, and that He gave us His only son, Jesus Christ, who died for our sins. I was
taught that we would be judged by God. When were judges given power to make
decisions for God? August 27, 2004, my wife and I were told to prepare ourselves to
make a decision to have life support turned off if our son made it through the
weekend. I started praying. I decided, it was not going to be my decision, but
God's. On Monday Aug. 30, they ran an EEG and found brain activity they weren't
expecting. Thank you, God, a miracle. 
 
God has kept Terri and my son alive for a reason - God's reason. You have the right
to live or die if you are in a terminal condition, but please let your
spouse/parents/children all know about your wishes. 
 
I wish I knew what my son would've wanted me to do, but I don't. I enjoy his smiles
and kisses every day. It his now between him and God. And I believe in miracles 
 
March 25th, 2005 
 
        I took a half-day off work today and spent some time with Colby and Mikey, it's
baseball season again, so we went and got them both new baseball cleats and Mikey
was ready for a new glove. We went and saw Brett for a little while, I have to tell
you since Brett lost his tooth Mikey hasn't wanted to go see him and we've always
told him that's ok, after Colby and I had been in his room for about 5 minutes
Mikey came walking in and went right to Brett s side and started rubbing Brett s
head, I was so proud, children grow up way to quick, I told Mikey later that night
how proud I was of him.  
 
        That evening Jennifer went and checked on Brett, while they were suctioning his
trach there started to appear blood, the nurse told Jennifer that it was probably
just irritation from the suctioning, later that night we found out his secretions
had become solid blood.  
 
March 26th, 2005 
 
        I went early to check on Brett and he was resting, his breathing was good and only
a slight pinkish tint in his suction tank. Again later that night around 8:00pm
Jennifer called me in tears, she had gotten into his room and found him with his
face pressed against the padding on the side of the bed and covered in blood, two
nurses or aids were sitting at the nursing station doing nothing, Jennifer walked
into the store room and got some towels to clean him up, she wasn't able to move
him, there were no nurses or aids that she had ever seen so when she started
telling me about his condition over the phone, she said they overheard her
conversation with me and jumped up and ran into Brett s room, I told her to stay by
the phone and I would call he right back. I got a hold of Janet Brewer who had been
assigned to Brett s wing for the past 3 months they had moved her to the other
wing, I told her what was going on and she went and took charge and informed the
weekend part-timers that Brett had to be watched more closely than the other
residents. Thank you Janet.  
 
March 27th, 2005 Easter Day 
        I got to the nursing home at 5:30am right before the shifts changed luckily I found
Carol one of Brett s regular nurses, she said she'd come in at 10:00pm Sat. night
and Brett did well through the night. We discussed his trach because apiece had
fallen of, I later found out it was to pump the diaphragm inside the trach to keep
it in place. The trach had slid out approx. 1 inch. I asked her to go ahead and
send him to the hospital to have it replaced and she agreed. I had called the
hospice nurse on duty the night before and had told her about the blood. I got back
to the house about 8:00am and no sooner the hospice nurse had called and said she
had been in contact with the nursing home throughout the night and she suggested
that we also send him to have the trach replaced, I told her I was one step ahead. 

        The ER called about 9:30am and told me they ran some lab work and everything was OK
and they were sending him back to the Nursing Home. Which was great, because my Mom
and Dad and younger Brother were coming down for the day. After lunch and Mom and
Dad taking the kids shopping we went to see Brett, he was out of it, he always is
after a trip to the ER, I also noticed a Rabbit made of wire with an envelope
addressed "Mom and Dad" I opened it and on the front it said, Someone up there
loves you. And on the inside it said, and someone down here loves you too. Love
you, Brett. WOW. We found out his night nurse Carol had done that for us, she had
also gotten Brett some new t-shirts, she cuts them in the back all the way up to
the collar so all you have to do is slip it over his head.  
        I also noticed that Brett s trach had not been replaced, I asked the nurse and she
said she would inquire about it, we didn't spend too much time and said our see you
laters and Mom and Dad and Phillip headed back to OKC. 
        I went back about 8:00 that night and Brett was in such a good mood we had such a
good visit I wrote a thank you letter to Carol and waited until she got there to
give it to her, once I handed it to her I left. 
 
March 29th 2005 
        Brett's hospice nurse Leann called and informed me she had talked to Brett s Dr.
and they were going to send him back to the ER to have a new Trach put in, she told
me what the piece was that had broken, I also talked with Donna Pack about possibly
getting a physical therapist to stop by once or twice and show me and Jennifer how
to give Brett some physical therapy, I ve been working the last couple of weeks
with his right arm and it seems to be helping. She said she would get with Brett s
Dr. and that she would let me know. 
 
April 21st 2005 
        They've started giving Brett Roxanol for pain; he seems to be preparing himself for
a journey. They only give him the Roxanol when he appears to be in severe pain. I
didn't think he could lose any more weight but he has. He now has a pressure sore
on his right shoulder blade. Brett has been a teacher now for almost 8 months, he
has taught not only our family, but also every Dr., nurses, aid, and individual he
has been in contact with. I pray daily for a miracle, and I get one everyday. The
past two weeks when Brett seems to be asleep or non-responsive, we will start
talking to him about Colby and Mikeys baseball games, it's amazing he will open his
eyes and listen to the game summary, it's truly remarkable. I wish we could take
him to a game; he loved watching them play baseball. 
 
April 26th 2005 
        I stopped by to check on Brett before Colby s baseball game, the second I walked in
I knew he was starting his journey, the nurse informed me that Hospice had given
orders to administer the Roxanol every two hours due to the increase of bed sores
and the infection in them. His breathing was slow, but he was resting. I made it to
Colby s game and told Jennifer to stay for a couple of innings and then go see
Brett that the time with him is short. She returned to the game before it was over
and told me to go stay the night with Brett. Mikey could tell something was wrong
and asked if Brett had died, we told him no, but he was starting his journey. Mikey
insisted on going with me, I prayed all the way there that Brett hadn't passed
before we got there. We walked into Brett s room and he was still with us. Mikey
put his arms around him the best he could and started crying, I told him it was ok.
I was so proud of Mikey that night and have told him so, how grown up he has become
in such a short time. I took Mikey back home and got back to the nursing home about
10:30pm. Carol his regular night nurse was on duty, she has done so much for not
just Brett but for our whole family, I was glad she was there. Brett s breathing
was about 4 breathes per minute but he wasn't laboring with them.  
 
April 27th 2005 
 
        Eight months to the day since the accident, I knew today would be my last day with
my son. During the night when I would leave his room Carol and other nurses and
aides would go into his room to spend some time with him, it was incredible to see
the love they had for my son. 6:00am shift change, I gave Carol time to spend with
Brett before she left, I walked her to her car and the tears I had were not for
Brett but for Carol and I told her so. There were several other nurses and aides
who also stopped by after their shift to tell him goodbye. The 6:00 to 2:00 shift
was quite amazed the he was still here. Jennifer arrived about 8:30am and we spent
the morning with Brett together, his breathing was now about 2-3 breathes per
minute. Chaplain Marti got there around noon and soon after Leann his hospice
nurse. What strength they both gave us. I asked Leann what her professional opinion
on how long Brett would be with us, minutes she replied. 2:00pm another shift
change again the people who have been taking care of my son for 7 mos. lined up to
tell him goodbye, the feeling I had was magical, again the lives he has touched.
2:00 to 10:00 shift, again, staff amazed Brett was still with us.
                                                                                                                                                 During the afternoon Jennifer and I would time his breaths
anywhere from 25 to 55 seconds between breaths, again not struggling but very
relaxed. I called my Dad to let him know what was going on, I was ok until I would
talk to my parents or one of my siblings, and then I would get pretty emotional. 
Nick had stayed with a friend the night before because they were leaving early on a
field trip to Dallas; I finally got a hold of him about 3:30. His friend and him
stopped and picked up Colby, I was so relieved that they were able to say goodbye
to their brother. Jennifer stayed until she had to go pickup Mikey and Addison; I
know it was hard for her to leave. Leann was on call tonight so if anything changed
she would be there. Shift change, amazing, again all the staff coming in too say
goodbye. They brought a bed into Brett s room so I wouldn't have to sleep in the
chair again tonight, which I really didn't mind.  Around 9:30pm Brett s' brother
Kallyn called, he had learned of Brett s worsening condition and wanted me to tell
him that he loved him and to give him a kiss, which I did.  There was a new night
nurse whom I hadn't met before; she seemed to be very nice and concerned. At about
11:00pm I checked on Brett and layed down, I was exhausted. At midnight the nurse
woke me and told me I had a phone call, I checked Brett before I answered the
phone, still here. It was Jennifer too check on Brett and to let me know it was no
longer the 27th. I hung up with her, checked on Brett again, and went back to
sleep. He looked so peaceful. 
 
April 28th, 2005 
 
        1:00am. The nurse woke me and told me that Brett had passed. I rubbed his head and
gave him a kiss. I called Jennifer to let her know.  I truly believe that Brett
held on those last 24 hours so everyone whose life he had touched had a chance too
tell him goodbye, and to go when Carol was not there. When Leann arrived she
pronounced him dead at 2:00am Thursday, April 28th, 2005. I knew where my son was
now, in no pain or suffering, in the hands of God. Waiting for him to lead him
through the gates into heaven. I gave Brett one last kiss and told him I loved him
so much. I got his room all packed while we waited for the funeral home and peace
came upon me, I knew my son was no longer suffering. I got home about 3:30 and
Jennifer and I held each other.  
        We went to bed and I just before I fell asleep with my eyes closed I saw a
beautiful purple light, shooting out of my right eye, headed for the heavens, then
images would flash, then a blue screen, and more images. I don't remember any of
the images just the bright purple light, like a shooting star. I believe that was
Brett saying goodbye, I'm going home. Yes he was.  
        We met with Mark Fisher with Fisher Funeral Home at 2:00pm my Mom and Dad were also
there we decided to have a Memorial Service on Sunday, May 1st. Since we had
already decided to have Brett s remains cremated, Mark gave us a board to make a
collage of pictures, we also decided to ask Chaplain Marti Mattner from Home
Hospice to officiate the services. Mark called Marti and she agreed, Mikey has a
ballgame at 6:00 and Colby has a band program at 7:00 it's going to be a long day
but it will help keep our minds busy. Jennifer s mom Maggie is also on her way from
Tulsa so we'll have lots of help.  
        I stayed and watched Mikeys ballgame, you could tell he wasn't into it; as a matter
of fact it seemed like the whole team forgot how to play baseball. Mom and Dad
stayed for a few innings and them went to watch Colby s band program, I was going
to watch Colby also, but it finished before Mikeys game. 
 
April 29th, 2005 
 
        I think I had the best nights sleep in months. I got up early and took Mikey and
Colby to school, and made Nick get up and go to school also, I let him stay home
yesterday. Jennifer and her Mom took Addison to daycare. I had the whole morning to
myself, it was so quite and peaceful, at one time I had 5 different Bibles in front
of me reading scripture. Also spent alot of time deciding which songs we were going
to play, I had already picked a couple but the hardest thing was remembering the
titles or the artist.  
        We met with Chaplain Marti at 1:30 at our house and went over the services; I
decided that I was going to attempt some type of eulogy at the services. Marti also
said that if any of the kids wanted to say anything or write it down and she would
say it in their names. It seemed like the phone would never quit ringing but we
didn't mind, about 10:30 this morning Meaghan, Nicks girlfriend called and I told
her I made him go to school, she was crying, she was a friend of Brett s, Nick met
her at the hospital. We spoke for a while and she calmed down, we've become very
close to her and love her just as if she were our daughter. I really don't remember
much of the day not that I was upset by anything; I think alot of it was just the
stress relief I was feeling. I do remember later that evening that Jennifer had
told me that Tony Palmer had called and was thinking about making the two day drive
from Washington state. I called Tony and talked to him and said that I would love
for him to be here but he wasn't in the best health and I surely wouldn't be able
to handle it if something happened to him on the way here. We talked for a while,
Tony has been more than a friend but a spiritual leader for us since the start, I
love him with all my heart. Jennifer asked if I had planned on Tony speaking if he
made it to the services, I told her of course. I had spoken several times about
Tony to Chaplain Marti; she knew what he meant to our family.  
 
April 30th, 2005 
 
        Actually slept in a little this morning, decided it was time for a hair cut, I'd
made a promise to myself that I wasn't going to cut my hair until Brett left the
nursing home, I had it trimmed twice, but never really cut, boy I got it cut today.
 Jennifer and Maggie took the kids shopping for clothes for Sunday. Mom and Dad
came by and took a bunch of laundry to the laundry mat. I did a few loads at the
house, and started working on my eulogy; Colby also started on one and said he
wanted to stand up and read it, pretty amazing for an 11yr old. 
        I started pulling pictures to put in the collage, I forgot how many pictures we
had, some I haven't looked at in years, and I wish I had taken more. It seemed time
was flying today. Colby has a game at 6:00 and all my family and Jennifer s will be
here today. Terry and Leslie Ezell will be here later tonight; I can't wait to see
everyone. Another good friend of ours, Rick Whitfield who was part of our group
years ago, is planning on staying the night with us.  
        Colby had a great game walked twice and had a two run double and scored twice, It
was pretty amazing because he had a bigger cheering section than the whole team
almost, My Mom and Dad, Jennifer s Dad and Judy, my sisters Becky and Molly who had
her husband Curtis and their son Boston, my brothers Chris and his youngest son
Chandler and my brother Phillip. Chris flew in from Orlando and we didn't know he
was bringing Chandler. We had a great time, Jennifer s dad brought pizza and ribs.
Colby won his game and is 5-0 for the season.  
        We got home about 8:30 had a message from Leslie that Rick had given her directions
to our house and she was on her way and that Terry was caught up and would be here
later. I called her cell and they had just pulled up to the gate, I couldn't wait
to see them.  
        In walked Leslie, with her daughter Tristan and her daughter Reese, also with them
was Terry s' brother Ronnie and his wife Diane. It was so nice to have them here;
again Les told me that Terry was running behind. We talked and I sat on the floor
working on the collage again, about 9:15 Rick Whitfield and Terry walked in, as I
got up, I couldn't believe it, standing behind Terry was Tony Palmer, I lost it, we
hugged and cried. I was shocked, they had planned this surprise and what a surprise
it was.  
        We spent most of the rest of the evening talking about old times, we had so much
fun. I had an old video that I took at a super bowl party at Eric Adams in Jan. of
1993; I took it so we could send it to Tony because he couldn't make it. At the
very end of the video I made a comment that it would probably be 10 yrs. or more,
before I would ever send it to Tony if I ever did. How perfect was this for us to
sit and watch this together, 12 yrs later.  
        Colby let Tony read what he was going to say tomorrow. Tony gave him some
suggestions about a couple of lines that maybe were a little too much to share,
Colby agreed and rewrote it. I had finished my eulogy, but it just didn't feel
right. We had planned on getting up and everyone going to Church Sunday morning,
but I still had so much to do. Tony and Rick stayed the night. I was so glad to
have everyone here. I feel guilty for not spending more time with my Brothers and
Sisters I hope they understand, I'm sure they do, I love them so much and am glad
they are here also. They've felt our pain and excitement since day one. 
 
Sunday May 1st, 2005 
 
        Got up pretty early, I called Chaplain Marti to let her know that Tony had made it,
she was thrilled. She told me that whatever changes I wanted to make were fine with
her. I didn't think my eulogy was right, so I sat on the back deck and started
going over it adding and deleting. There was also the problem of the songs I had
chosen, the funeral home only had two of the four songs I wanted to be played. Rick
called a friend of his and she burned Wind Beneath My Wings, I decided to play
Bright Lights, by Matchbox Twenty, because it had alot of meaning to me. Les and I
had talked about it last night and she thought that I should play it. People
started coming out to the house and it was wonderful, Nick and Meaghan got to the
house about 11:30am it was neat for people who haven't seen him in years and people
he doesn't remember, except from stories, to see.  
        I couldn't believe it, looked up and it was already 12:30pm. Jennifer and I arrived
at the Chapel about 1:20; Tony and Chaplain Marti met and discussed what they would
be doing. As we were getting ready to go into the Chapel, Jennifer motioned to me,
come see this, she said. I looked outside and here they were coming, 20-25 of
Brett's friends coming together, what a beautiful sight, alot of them I hadn't seen
since Brett was in the hospital in Plano.  The service would begin with "I Can Only
Imagine" then Chaplain Marti gave a wonderful opening, then "Angel". Now was the
moment, I was nervous and anxious, Colby got up to the podium and without a beat
gave the most amazing tribute. I would like to share with you what he said; you'll
miss the best part, hearing him say it. 
 
 
My name is Colby Bostick and Brett is my big brother. 
I remember I woke up the morning of August 27, 2004 by the door slamming. 
I walked into the living room and asked Mom where Dad was. She said he went to Plano. 
I asked her why? 
She told me that Brett was in an accident. 
That was a day I will never forget. So what I did to get that off my mind, was to
think 
about all the good times we had, like when he took us to the park and buried us in
the rocks. 
April 27th 2005 at midnight my Mom called my Dad at the nursing home. 
He said Brett was still here, she said ok it isn't the 27th anymore. 
April 28th 2005 1:08am my Mom gets a call, it's my Dad and he said Brett is gone. 
I went to school and about 6th period my principal and counselor told the 6th grade
the my brother 
and my friend Megan Tyree's Dad died that morning. 
My friends ask me how could I not be so emotional. 
I said I've had 8 months to prepare for this day and instead of thinking negatively,
I think positive thoughts. 
My counselor called me to her office and told me about Megans Dad. 
I told her I felt bad because I had 8 months to prepare for this day; she had no
time at all. 
I told everyone who asked about him, he is in a better placed now. 
I know him well; he would not want to be in that bed for 8 months. 
I have some advice to give all of you, to make it easier on yourself, just think of 
all the good times that you've had with Brett 
Thank you. 
 
         After the service everyone was so impressed that an 11yr old could stand up there
in front of that many people and give such a remarkable memorial to Brett, it
still gives me chills. That courage gave me the strength to follow him and give my
eulogy. I felt so comfortable; I could feel Gods strength and Brett s hand on my
shoulder as I spoke. I spoke from the heart and left out things I had written down
and added things I hadn't. 
        Our family has been through several severe accidents over the years some serious
and some not so serious, on our way to the service I had Jennifer write down my
opening remarks, I don't know where it came from but suddenly it was there. 
 
The Bostick family has been blessed by God with armor made of steel 
which has taken many blows. 
The last blow was Aug. 27th 2004. 
That armor was pierced April 28th 2005. 
 
 
 After I spoke "Bright Lights" I left out the ending of my eulogy, which were some
lyrics of this song.  
 
 
Some things in this world you just can't change 
Some things you can't see until it's too late 
 
Some things in this world that just don't make sense 
Some things you don't need until they leave you, then they're the things that you miss 
 
I've got a hole in me now 
I've got a scar I can talk about 
 
        Then Tony spoke he opened with a prayer and then relaxed everyone by telling them
not to let his Robe make them uneasy, that this was hard for him, to stand and give
a service to someone you had held as a baby and who was your God son. His sermon
and his words were from the heart; it was wonderful to have him here. 
        The last song "Wind Beneath My Wings" 
 
        After the service Mom and Dad had reserved a banquet room at the hotel they were
staying at several people attended and it was so relaxing, I felt more relaxed than
I have in months.  
 
        This is not the end of my story, but just the beginning. To everyone who has helped
Brett and our family the last 8 months, thank you from the bottom of our hearts and
God Bless you. 
 
David Bostick 
 
 
 
 
10/22/04 
To my Mom and Dad, 
I love you so much, my father who stayed at the hospital everyday after I had to go
back to work, and they still come down once a week from OKC. My grandmother is in
assisted-living and they have to take care of her also. 
What wonderful parents I have. Brett what wonderful grandparents you have. 
To my wife Jennifer, 
You have been Brett's mother since he was 7 and he never once has called you
step-mom, you take care of the other kids everyday while I'm with Brett, I'm
grateful for you and I'm sorry, I promise I'll make it up. I love you with all my
heart. 
To Nicholas, 17 
Who by the way just got lead in the school one act play, way to go son. I pray that
you have learned from what has happened, I know that Brett is you idol, and you know
how much he loves you, never, ever forget that. I love you. 
To Colby, 11 
I think you have been one of the best parts of Brett's rehab so far, the way you lay
at his pillow and rub his head and whisper into his ear, I can tell by the look in
his eyes how much he loves you. I love you. 
To Mikey, 9 
I believe this has been hardest on you son, I'm sorry I haven't spent the time with
you that I should and I promise to do better. I love you so much and it hurts me to
see you hurt. 
To Addison, 4 
You are all of our princess' I hope you will always remember the time Brett and
Candi would take you to the park. Every time I tell Brett you're coming to visit his
eyes light up. I know I don't have to tell you this but you are special, I love you.

To God, 
Thank you for you love, for your gift to all of us, your son Jesus Christ. 
 


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Email  David Bostick